Monday, April 6, 2009

Daddy Was So Stingy!

While my Daddy was home on vacation he didn't share the computer much. Just long enough for Mommy to check her e-mails, she couldn't help me blog or anything. Anyway, today he went back to work & we have the computer(WOOHOO!) so we will be checking to see what y'all have been up to! I wanted to ask a question first, this is a serious question & my Mommy is very confused over what she has found on the Internet. As you all know my Mommy is training me to walk off leash. Amber Mae said I needed to learn to heel first, no problem Mommy said. We went on-line to get some tips & what Mommy found out really shocked her. When I walk ahead of my Mommy I'm telling her that I'm the alpha in this relationship, now we do some dominance training but my Mommy always lets me walk & sniff as I please. This site said NO WAY! I don't get to do that, I have to stay either beside or behind my Mommy! She chooses where I got potty! So that was all fine & dandy with me & Mommy, I learn to walk beside her in less that 10 minutes! Mommy was so proud! I already wait before crossing the street & leaving the house so she just focused on the walking. As long as nobody takes me out of my 'zone' I'm a good boy!
Now this is what is confusing to my Mommy, & I'm going to give you the link to go there & read it for yourselves, so maybe you can explain it to her better. On the site it talks about not hugging your dogs when they're scared, Mommy understands that maybe SOME dogs may not want to be hugged when they're scared but when there is a real bad thunder storm I burrow under my Mommy's legs! While she laughs, she knows I'm scared & usually tucks me in with her & we watch t.v. together. Should she push me away? Another example, it says, 'Affection does not make dogs happy...but must be done at the right time'. When is the right time? My Mommy loves on me all the time, & I give her kisses. When she is on the computer I try to get in her lap, NOW she thinks that's me trying to prove I'm alpha instead of just being cute. I wish she wouldn't have read that article!

35 comments:

Libby's Library said...

Eduardo - this comment is for your mom!

For the most part, I think a lot of trainers do a good job BUT - you have to decide what WORKS BEST FOR YOU!!!

I do think that the info on hugging and giving lots of attention when Eduardo gets really scared, is on target..it's kind of the same with little kids. The more you make a big deal out of something...the more they seem to worry. Tell Eduardo that everything is okay...give him a quick hug, or scratch - and then go on to whatever it is that you were doing. He'll pick up on your "everything is okay vibes"!

Many trainers will tell you that you shouldn't allow your pets to sleep in the bed with you, but I like having George sleep with me. He isn't aggressive, he isn't terribly demanding,(and to be perfectly honest...he's a few "bones short of a skeleton, if you get my drift"), and he doesn't have a lot of bad behavior. I do wish that I had taught him front door manners.

Do what your gut tells you, and everything will work out just fine.

Chase said...

Hi Eduardo,

There is nothing wrong with snuggling when you are scared! I agree with the first post.

:-)

Sniffs and licks,

Chase

NAK and The Residents of The Khottage Now With KhattleDog! said...

The walking thing is fur the khats -

It is much better fur Mom to see my fluffy tail ahead of her!

It has nothing to do with the alpha stuff!

Woo need to do what works fur woo!

Hugz&Khysses,
Khyra

Nibbles Treats said...

We think as long as you want the affection and are giving it back, then that is always the best. No two dogs are alike. Go with the flow!

Tinkerbell, Oscar and Tucker

H.A. Turbofire, Sibertarian said...

Just keep this one thing in mind, humans are stupid. And the most stupid humans are the ones that say stupid things like "don't hug dogs."

Nevis said...

Love your wiggly photo where you're all curved on the floor! Super cute!

Anonymous said...

I haven't clicked onto the site referenced yet, but just from what was conveyed here in this post, I think what you read is right on. The reason for not comforting a dog when they are frightened is that is telling them that it is GOOD to be frightened...and that isn't the message you want your dog to learn! It tends to FOSTER fearfulness in a dog. Far better is just to remain calm and nonchalant...then, the moment your dog is demonstrating calmness, too, praise and reward THAT response. Human psychology and dog psychology are not interchangeable. Dogs process things differently than humans do.

I used to view our walks as the time for the dogs to get their exercise, so I would let them run ahead of me. Not any more. Sometimes I do take them places where they can just run loose, but the daily walks are more a MENTAL exercise for my dogs. We walk about three miles, but they walk BESIDE me or behind me, never in front. And I decide when to give them permission to begin sniffing along the way (usually after we have walked far enough that they have had a chance to show me they are looking to ME for direction/permission). This change (from unstructured walks to walks where I am the leader) has made a HUGE difference in the dogs. They LOVE the walks, even though they are not allowed to run on ahead...and they are much more relaxed now as a GROUP when I am NOT around. The border collie had gotten into some dominance problems (picking on the Newfoundland, guarding food, etc) and the German Shepherd pup already had dominance issues before she joined our family...but since we have started the daily STRUCTURED walks where they all FOLLOW, there has not been a single unpleasant incident occur in the back yard. They are a cohesive group now, and the border collie has settled down and turned sweet again. Meanwhile, the Newfoundland, who used to spend all day in her doghouse, has become far more active and interactive. I never realized she was DEPRESSED...she has always been a low energy dog...but, once we began daily structured walks, her energy level went up (still far less than your average dog, though) and she just blossomed! She is really perky these days! Best of all, there is no fighting and no food guarding...no problems at all between the three dogs. This is a DIRECT result of them following me on daily walks. It just made a huge impact on our household.

Finally, there is nothing at all wrong with your pup being in your lap while you are on the computer if YOU have invited him up there... If he invites himself, I would suggest you scoot him back off your lap. Wait until he is waiting respectfully and THEN you can invite him up on your lap. You should be the one who does the inviting, though...he should learn to wait for an invitation!

~Monica
(Ransom's Obnoxious Spokesperson)

Deetz said...

Snuggles work, especially snuggly pugglies....Your too adorable and my mum wants to snuggle you
Deetzy

Gus said...

I am soooooo out of this discussion. My only comment is that if muzzer had believed the internets, she probably would have died of breast cancer, happily taking her black cohosh and a few other herbal remedies.

gussie's muzzer

ps. I don't have a problem anthropomorphizing the dogs. And I KNOW Teka is the alpha dog in this family. Just ask her.

Agatha and Archie said...

Wellso far we agree with everyone....Our dog behaviourist said you can hug away but do it on the Nothing in life is free program..so instead of sticking our heads in PL2's lap for a cuddle when we want one she just makes us sit first...whatever... it all works out in the end..and i am afraid of the thunder as well and if PL2 makes a big deal then I get worse so she lets me hide behind her legs but doesn't talk a lot (even though it kills her) Love and kisses A+A

I'm Mommy's Little Pooh ... Lainey said...

I say its JUST like 2 legged kids DO WHAT WORKS for YOU and your baby 2 or 4 legs!!!! MOMMY would NEVER stop hugging me I am a PUGGLE and we GET the LOVING as much as GIVE. Look at how Dr. Spock was with child rearing in the 60's!!! DO what YOU are comfortable with! well thats my 2 little cents worth anyways :0)

♥♥ The OP Pack ♥♥ said...

There is a lot of great advice in all those comments before us so we will leave it to those who know best. We love to get hugs all the time but we understand about not wanting to do it if it makes us think it is OK to be afraid. Better to understand that all is OK and we are safe.

Nice pics of you. Love the twisty twist one.

Woos, the OP Pack

Mr. Puggle® said...

ed, u r making us look bad again. i am suppose to walk next to my humans but it is a struggle for this crazy puggle.

Erin said...

I know for a fact, that comforting and petting a dog when its scared is letting them know its OK to be scared, which as you know is the opposite of what you are trying to convey!!
If you are calm and relaxed during a T-storm, hopefully you can use your calmness to help Eduardo realize its no big deal.
It will work! Bubbles used to be terrified during thunderstorms, but yesterday we went through one, and she didn't even shake!!!!!!!!!!!!
Good luck! You can do it!

Erin said...

Nother comment regarding affection...nothing wrong with that, just watch when you give it....Texas loves to come up and jump, and jump and jump on your leg....begging for attention. He does not get it, until he has four on the floor, and is calm, the we snuggle, and play etc..etc There is a time for everything!!

All these is only hard on us the humans really!

Lois Lane/Laney said...

Yeah, not all dogs are the same or even think the same. Some love cuddles, some don't. I'd just go with whatever works for you and Eduardo.
Personally, I love cuddling with my mom.. even hugs from her. I don't know what "personal space" means. BOL

Checkers & Chess said...

Eduardo and Eduarodo's mommy - You gotta do what works for the 2 of you. I went to obedience school and I had a trainer who was all about reward and not punishment - so I really liked her - one thing she told us was that every dog is different...and you have to figure out how things work between the two of you. I love cuddles too. Tell your mommy not to believe everything she reads - just to work with you and love you - and you do the same Eduardo - she needs you to cooperate

your buddy Checkers

Mason Dixie said...

I hug, and kiss my mom. I am a good dog and am very happy, to me that is all that matters. =)

Unknown said...

hmmmmmmmm. Considering that Madison is a "work in progress" we could go on and on. About the walking in particular though. Because we live in a condo, Madison never gets to "just hang out in the backyard." So when we walk, H-Mom says "OKAY" and then Madison is allowed to wander, within the parameters of a six foot leash. She sniffs, dawdles, pees and circles where ever she is so inclined. As long as she doesn't trip H-Mom. If H-Mom says "AROUND" that means that Madison has to pay attention to a tree or a post so as not to get tangled. Then we get to a street or other public area, H-Mom says HEAL that that means HEAL until the "OKAY" command. This works well for us. And Madison does very well. She even knows the command "SIDEWALK" which is a correction for when she steps off into the street or takes a corner too quickly. Also, NO lunging for lizards or squirrels. Lots of polite sniffing around is allowed though. Not every WALK is a SERIOUS HEAL OR PAY HELL walk for this condo-dog. Some "walks" are just strolls, and H-Mom thinks that's okay. Somewhere H-Mom read that as long as the HUMAN is holding the leash, the DOG knows its place. It's not the dog holding the leash and the human going where the dog wants.

The Devil Dog said...

Well, mommy doesn't agree with the no snuggling just for snuggling part at all. She does agree with rewarding being scared behavior. As far as the walks go, Lucky walks right by mom's side, but I don't. As long as I don't pull mom, mom thinks I am okay.

Roxy

Lorenza said...

Hi, Eduardo!
I am not trained at all. I am always on leash because our streets are small with lots of traffic and my mom prefers I go ahead of her. I am not a puller anymore so she thinks it is fine.
When something scares me I go between my mom's legs and she does not say a word to me.
Tell your mom to do what she feels is better for you and her.
Good luck
Kisses and hugs
Lorenza

lola said...

oh no! when I am scared I am instantly looking for my mommy and I am always pleased to find her looking for me too. It's like she knows im going to be scared and comes looking. She snuggles me the best!

lola.

Rambo said...

If you like to snuggle when you are scared, then I think you should snuggle. (if it's alright with you Mom of course)
Rambo

Huskee and Hershey said...

Hi Eduardo,
Both of us are terrified of lightning/ thunder and when that happens, I (Huskee) run and hide in the toilet and Hershey runs around te house like a crazed pup... Mom talks to us in a low soothing voice to assure us that it's nothing out of te norm and then she pretends that everything is normal and continue with whatever she's doing.

Us4 Cats said...

Oooooooh yes, we read all that alpha dog stuff, watched dog whisperer. it was overload.

cats are so much more easy to just be. the kitties just are who they are and no hidden reasons unknown to eith party.

we have a pug. anymore we just watch and learn, learn and watch, but mom bean, me, still regresses back to what Ceaser says. It does work. takes alot of routine and dogs tend to forget, unlike cats : ) hehehe.

Karen Jo said...

I know just about nothing about training or living with dogs, so I won't comment on the article. I used to take my brother's dog, Nicky, on long walks and I preferred that she be in front of me, so I could keep an eye on what she was doing. She still stopped dead whenever we reached the corner of the sidewalk and waited for me to decide whether we would cross the street or turn the corner. She knew that I was the one in charge.

Suzuki said...

Hi Eduardo
Please tell your Mummy that my Mummy and Daddy love us fur kids furry much. They cuddle us when we are scared and they are always giving us cuddles and we still respect and listen to them. Oh, and Bark said she would not be able to work today because I had a date with Checkers :)
Big licks to you
Suzuki
xxx

Martha said...

You need to get a second computer! I agree with everyone else, as painful as it is, no reinforcing scaredyness. Bummer, eh? Love, Martha

Clover said...

Hi Eduardo,
Looks like your mom got lots of advice here already. It is hard to decide what to do when there is so much different info out there regarding dog training. Definitely your mom should stick with what she believes in, and should do what works best for both of you.
We had a professional dog trainer come in to our house to work with me (I can't imagine why - I am perfectly well behaved!! BOL!) and the main point that we took away from our meeting is that our parents should be clearly in charge, and this means that they should not cave to my "demands", so basically, they can let me on the couch, pick me up, give me a treat, let me pee where I want, etc, BUT that they should initiate it. So they should invite me up to their lap, or indicate that it is ok to run and pee where I want, etc. Does this make sense?
Please pee mail me (clover_badgerATyahooDOTca) if you are interested in learning more about this kind of training. Our trainer sends us lots of emails about different topics, but we don't want to overload you with too many different ideas!
Love Clover xo

Petra said...

You're a snuggle puggle, Edwardo, so you need to have lots of snuggles and love and affection. Tell your mom not to stop! Tjat's the advice from someone who gets scared like you do.

Honey said...

Hi There Eduardo!
Nice to meet you! Great site, and lots to see and read.
Hope to visit again soon...and my mom may email for a little assistance on MY site!
Cheers, Honey (13 yo golden)
www.supertrooperhoney.blogspot.com

Jemima Jones Beck said...

When I was in puppy class Mom and Dad were told that hugging a dog when they were scared would basically "ruin" the dog. It would turn them into a coward that jumps up on Mom/Dad's lap any time that they are afraid instead of facing their fears and this would eventually lead to a dog who was all fears. And, like Monica said, it teaches the dog that fears are good.

Dexter said...

Oh, poor Eduardo. I think what it means is that when you are scared, that giving you cuddles makes it seem like you are right to be scared. When we get scared, Momma just kind of ignores us and says, "oh get over it silly dogs." It is hard to do, but it does help.

I get scared when I ride in the car and momma ignores me, but then if I settle down and relax she pats me and says good boy.

Your momma is brave to take you off leash. Mine is too big a chicken.

Kisses,
Dexter

Puglette said...

what a good post and such interesting comments! it sure has me thinking.
hugs,
puglette
:o)

TwoSpecialWires said...

hmmrrph! We love your blog. We didn't like "the site" at all. Couldn't even read it all.

Each to their own. We know what is best for US and it is working quite well! Come visit when you have a chance. We stumbled upon you... and now will go twitter you, too!